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All relationships go through difficult times. Two people in a relationship or marriage often have differing expectations of what they want from the relationship. They may have trouble communicating those expectations to each other or get caught up in their busy lives and the demands of children or work.  A happy, emotionally resilient relationship doesn’t mean that you agree on everything and never argue. In fact, it could be said that a relationship that appears flawless has some deep underlying issues. Emotionally resilient relationships weather life’s ups and downs through good communication and treating each other with respect.

A successful relationship is one where partners are able to effectively discuss issues causing conflict and resolve them. When conflict resolution is replaced by constant criticism and spiralling arguments couples end up feeling hurt and misunderstood. Feelings of resentment and hurt can build over time until couples barely communicate except when necessary. Learning more effective communication skills can assist couple to understand each other’s viewpoints. Without such changes old unhelpful behaviours become a habit, and an accepted part of the relationship.  This can lead to tension and resentment which brings the vicious circle around to more criticism and even worse, disrespect and sarcasm. .

Many couples wait until their relationship is falling apart and many are at the point of separation before they seek counselling. Learning new skills can improve understanding between the couple many of whom have children’s needs to consider as well. Techniques such as learning to understand each other’s views and feelings can help break down barriers between couples. Exploring the reason you decided to be together and what the relationship was like when things were going well can also help.

A trained professional psychologist can teach you how to listen to each other and to understand the feelings behind the message. Sometimes triggers from past relationships can also impact on your current situation. Blended families can also present many issues of conflict, particularly where there are children involved. Learning to cope with the specific problems in your relationship can help your life to less stressful and more enjoyable.

Making Relationships WorkWith over thirty years’ experience Margaret McDonald can teach you strategies and give you tools to help get your relationship back on the right track.  Please don’t hesitate to phone our office on 3862 8833 or email reception@mmcdonald.com.au.